POLICE ASSOCIATION OF NOVA SCOTIA 137 What is Bullying? Bullying is a conscious, willful, deliberate, hostile and repeated behaviour by one or more people, which is intended to harm others. Bullying takes many forms, and can include many different behaviours, such as: • physical violence and attacks • verbal taunts, name-calling and put-downs • threats and intimidation • extortion or stealing of money and possessions • exclusion from the peer group Bullying is the assertion of power through aggression. Its forms change with age: school playground bullying, sexual harassment, gang attacks, date violence, assault, marital violence, child abuse, workplace harassment and elder abuse (Pepler and Craig, 1997). “Bullying is not about anger. It is not a conflict to be resolved, it’s about contempt –a powerful feeling of dislike toward someone considered to be worthless, inferior or undeserving of respect. Contempt comes with three apparent psychological advantages that allow kids to harm others without feeling empathy, compassion or shame. These are: a sense of entitlement, that they have the right to hurt or control others, an intolerance towards difference, and a freedom to exclude, bar, isolate and segregate others” (Barbara Coloroso “The Bully, the Bullied and the Bystander). Bullying Myths and Facts: Myth: “Bullying is just a stage, a normal part of life. I went through it, my kids will too. ” Fact: Bullying is not “normal” or socially acceptable behaviour. We give bullies power by our acceptance of this behaviour. Myth: “If I tell someone, it will just make it worse.” Fact: Research shows that bullying will stop when adults in authority and peers get involved . Myth: “Just stand up for yourself and hit them back.” Fact: While there are some times when people can be forced to defend themselves, hitting back usually makes the bullying worse and increases the risk for serious physical harm. Myth: “Bullying is a school problem, the teachers should handle it.” Fact: Bullying is a broader social problem that often happens outside of schools, on the street, at shopping centers, the local pool, summer camp and in the adult workplace.” Myth: “People are born bullies.” Fact: Bullying is a learned behaviour and behaviours can be changed. www.bullying.org is a multiple award-winning, nonprofit Web site that was created to help people around the world deal with the issues of bullying and taunting. www.bullying.org is a supportive international community where people can learn that they are NOT alone in being bullied and taunted, that being bullied and taunted is NOT their fault and that they CAN do something positive about it. People can contribute their personal stories, poems, images, oral stories (audio files), music, animations and movies. In order to protect contributors’ privacy and security, no last names of young people, or personal contact information is published or shared with anyone else. www.bullying.org also has two moderated, online support groups, one for youth and one for adults. continued...
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